Donna Karan presents her Urban Zen project, Discover Haiti Exhibition, which is a collection of art, accessories, clothing, and home furnishings designed and produced in Haiti. Along with amazing art for sale, with full proceeds going to Haiti, there were also lively musical performances and cocktails courtesy of Grey Goose, flowing throughout the evening.

1) Your Parking Tickets Cost More Than Your Car Payments

2) You Call The Epicure Menu Line More Than You Call Your Mom

3) You Haven’t Been On Ocean Drive In Years

4) Your Starter Apartment Was On West Ave

5) You Have Multiple Gym Memberships

6) You Secretly Watch Deco Drive

7) You Know The Cocktail Waitresses At LIV, Story And Set By First Name

8) You’ve Booked Out Of Town Plans For The Next Five Memorial Day Weekends

9) You’ve Ended Up In B-Roll For A Reality TV Show Or Music Video

10) You Know About The Fried Chicken at Joe’s Stone Crab

11) Pay For A Drink? Never!

12) You Think The Standard Is Your Country Club

13) You Can Sense Whether A Nightclub/Restaurant Is Going To Fail On Opening Night

14) Sunday Funday Is Every Day of The Week

15) You Think You Need A Passport To Go To Fort Lauderdale

16) You Would Rather Go To Fort Lauderdale Than Eat Carbs

17) You Have A Real Job But Keep It On The DL

18) You Bitch About Jugo Fresh Being Too Expensive But Still Go There Anyway

19) You Can Navigate Art Basel And The Satellite Fairs With James Bond-Like Precision

20) You’ve Walked In Knee-Deep Water And Posted The Photos On Facebook and Instagram (Thanks City Of Miami Beach!)

Photo by Carlos Miller.

21) You Have Woken Up With Confetti In Your Hair More Than Once

22) You’ve Been To A Lingerie Party

23) You Don’t Have To Wait At Prime 112

24) You Think Every Week Is Wine Week At Smith & Wollensky

25) You Have A Pool But Don’t Use It

26) You Are Friends With Michael Capponi

27) You Dated A Model And/Or Stripper

28) You Can Distinguish A Ferrari From A Lamborghini Solely By The Engine Sound

29) You Still Refer To The New Publix Even Though It Opened in 1998 And There’s An Even Newer One

30) You Are Reading This Hungover

There are probably hundreds more. Please comment below on other telltale signs that you live on South Beach.

The mystery has been solved! The bleached blonde Miami Heat fan spawning internet memes for her one-finger salute of Chicago Bulls player Joakim Noah last night is none other than Filomena Tobias. The sensational photo has gone viral, with people all over the world asking who is this “classy” woman?

In a typical tawdry South Florida tale, Filomena (who sometimes goes by Phyllis) is a privileged person with a past. With the suspicious death of her fourth husband, hedgefund powerhouse Seth Tobias, in 2007, Filomena took some heat for the untimely demise. It gets better, though. Her psychic at the time, Billy Ash, claims she murdered Seth.

While Filomena was never charged with anything related to her late husband’s passing, you can read all the sordid details in this 2008 New York magazine piece. Trust me, it’s an entertaining read.

Coincidentally, I have met Filomena a few times in Miami, most significantly during a raucous Sunday afternoon at La Piaggia a few years ago. In between her ordering countless bottles of rose and champagne, I remember that she had a mouth on her and cursed like a sailor on leave. She was certainly generous that afternoon, as the tab must have been in the thousands, and seemed confident, fearless and, well, crass.

That audacity obviously reared its head again last night, as Filomena pushed her middle finger into Joakim Noah as he was ejected during the Heat’s revenge-trouncing of the Bulls at the Triple A. While we all despise the Bulls, it’s unsportsmanlike behavior like this, from a woman no less, that gives Miami its bad rep. In fact, the picture has been doctored and reposted all over the web with “Welcome To Miami” jokes. The Sun-Sentinel has some great video of the incident, too.

Filomena is a longtime season ticket holder. No word on what will happen during the next home game, next Wednesday, of the Heat-Bulls Playoff series. But we’ll be watching.

Actress Julianne Hough attended the Condé Nast Traveler Hot List Party at the SLS Hotel South Beach. sbe founder Sam Nazarian and Condé Nast Traveler’s Vice President & Publisher Carolyn Kremins were also in attendance to celebrate the 17th annual list that includes over 154 new hotels featuring the best in hospitality and overall service.

The Miami Marine Stadium is truly a unique and iconic facility that has garnered quite a bit of attention over the last five years thanks to the Friends of Miami Marine Stadium, a volunteer group that seeks to restore the stadium and recapture the magic of the past during the period of 1962-1992. Co-founders Donald Worth and Hilario Candela, who is also the stadium architect, speaks on the construction of the facility, the glory days and present plans to bring back this Miami gem.

Make-A-Wish Ball Chairman Shareef Malnik and his dad, Lifetime Benefactor Al Malnik, threw a Garden Party in honor of their biggest donors and contributors for the Make-A-Wish Ball at their lavish mansion in Boynton Beach. Shareef’s girlfriend, actress Gabrielle Anwar, and legendary boxing promoter Don King were also in attendance for the special occasion.

In celebration of the relaunch of the Miami Art Museum as the Peréz Art Museum Miami, esteemed art collectors and museum donors, Darlene Peréz and Debra Scholl, hosted a Carolina Herrera fall preview show with Carolina Herrera herself at her boutique in the Bal Harbour Shops. Patrons sipped on champagne, while models roamed about the store in a gorgeous musically inspired 40′s style collection of dresses and gowns.

Philanthropists Roy Black and his wife, Real Housewives of Miami star Lea Black threw their annual fundraising event “The Black’s Annual Gala” at the Fontainebleau Hotel, and it was a quite a night. Several hundred celebrities and socialities attended including fellow housewives Lisa Hochstein, Karent Sierra and Joanna Krupa, as well as Dennis Rodman, Lance Bass and Flo Rida.  There were cocktails, a gourmet dinner and silent auction for all to enjoy. Watch Flo Rida wow the crowd by putting on an electrifying, bare performance at the end of the night. Proceeds from the gala will benefit a collection of youth related causes, including the Black’s own “Consequences Charity” for at-risk youth.

Erin Newberg modeling the Pauline bag named after Moynat’s original owner, Pauline Moynat.

The next “It” bag is Moynat’s Rejane. It’s stunning, chic and only available in Paris. This level of exclusivity makes waitlists and limited editions seem boring. While on my European vacation, I was fortunate to spend time with Mr. Ramesh Nair, the Creative Director of Moynat.

But let me back up first: Personally, I find it difficult to walk into a shop like Galeries Lafayette and get excited over mass produced “luxury,” hence my vintage addiction. Vintage clothing and handbags were made with love, care and consideration. Today, everyone and their mothers are carrying the same Balenciaga and Chanel bags. I prefer to be the girl in the room in the ‘70s YSL ensemble that no one else has. I do shop retail, but I demand amazing quality. It is so rare to find modern brands that define luxury. One is Hermes, which I collect—both vintage and new.

The brand I am most excited about currently is Moynat. Creative Director Ramesh Nair worked at Hermes during the Jean Paul Gaultier days. Before his stint at Hermes, he was with Maison Martin Margiela and Christian Lacroix. These fashion houses define luxury, simplicity, elegance and quality. So, Nair has an impressive pedigree.

Moynat dates back to 1849 when Pauline Moynat began designing trunks for trans-Atlantic crossings. This makes Moynat older than Louis Vuitton and Goyard. The company also has the distinction of being founded by a woman, which was unusual for the 1800’s. Nevertheless, by 1976 Moynat was shuttered. It was resurrected by LVMH three years ago and has become a hot commodity in an overflowing category. Aside from the stylish bags and luggage, Moynat’s exclusivity and dedication to craftsmanship over mass production has made it an anomaly in today’s fashion world.

Erin Newberg and Moynat’s Creative Director Ramesh Nair.

Moynat is only available in Paris, at their shop on Rue Saint-Honoré, which is where I found myself yesterday. During each of my trips abroad, I buy one important piece. Selecting the bag I wanted at Moynat proved to be more difficult than I expected as there were so many colors and styles to choose from. I am in love with their latest model, the Rejane (priced at about 3,200 Euros). More than retail therapy, I also was introduced to the brand’s President, Guillaume Davin, and then to the master, the genius and my newest Scorpio obsession, Mr. Nair.

When the Indian-born Creative Director first came down to the shop (yes, Ramesh works upstairs in an incredible studio/museum), I was so honored. This man, employed by LVMH, was SO humble and delicious. We conversed like there was no tomorrow, discussing our mutual issues speaking French. For example, “prends moi,” means take me. I said that about the bag because when you pronounce it, it sounds like “pour moi,” like “for me,” but no, it’s sexual. HA! He once told JPGaultier about a horse bit, like the Hermes horse bit, in the mouth. However, in French, “bit” means a man’s privates, so this faux pas required him to go to mandatory French school. I’m not quite there yet, but love the “bit.”

Back to Moynat! My mother decided to get a bag as well. The whole team helped us choose the best colors. I think we will take a Blue Jean and the new color that I dubbed “Raspberry,” even though it’s not the name (the staff loved my input). Then before I knew it, Ramesh walked me upstairs for le grand tour of the second floor of the shop with all of the men’s goods (including sexy briefcases) followed by the private offices. As the doors opened (yes, it was an experience, the doors of old Parisian buildings make all others seem insignificant), in front of my eyes were about 30 antique Moynat suitcases, ranging in size, color and condition, from the 1870’s.

Moynat’s custom bicycle. Photograph by Ramesh Nair.

This vintage suitcase collection is owned by Guillaume and Ramesh, which I find SO interesting because these two joined the company together when LVMH resurrected the dormant brand in 2010. They believed so much in the company that they personally invested in the original luggage, which isn’t easy to find. Each old and refurbished suitcase/briefcase/trunk is the inspiration of the mod styles sold in the shop today. Moynat’s bags and suitcases have elements and curvatures like the old trunks, which were made for carriages, then in more modern times, for limousines.

In front of the trunks was a bicycle I dream of, with a picnic basket that was built to fit perfectly over the wheel of the bicycle. Ramesh had me straddle the bike and as he photographed me, he noted how photogenic I am. I fell in love further, of course, with a male Scorpio! Then we went to the main office where he told me that his colleagues were his saviors when he became nervous, which struck me because he doesn’t seem the type to become a nervous mess.

Attached to the main office, with huge windows overlooking the Rue Saint-Honoré, were two rooms where two artists worked. One was an expert in making samples and the other was a woman who hand-paints initials on the bags if a customer wants monogramming. It takes a day and a half to do that, did you know? The beautiful artisan lady who was making the samples of the bags was creating handles of a women’s bag. So much work goes into the handles: There are many sheets of leather that are glued together but filled with another leather piece, which gives the handle its thickness and shape. She studied for ten years to get where she is today. A true artist I tell you! So much love, care and attention goes into each item produced. And each bag is a bit different because they are handmade by six artisans in Burgundy.

One of the artisans at Moynat.

The “It” bag, the Rejane.

Do you understand my obsession now? A bag is a bag, yes, but when you see the true detail, craftsmanship and care that goes into each piece, it makes it more special and desirable. Before this company takes off to greater heights, I am proud to say, mom and I are the owners of the Rejane bag. I walked out with way too many laughs, being photographed by Ramesh and new friends at the shop. It was my personal dream; the best three hours a fashionista could have spent in an afternoon.

The musical version of “Priscilla Queen of the Desert” got me thinking about South Beach’s former drag queen scene.

Over the weekend, I saw the musical version of one of my favorite movies, Priscilla Queen of the Desert. My friend, who invited me, hadn’t seen the movie. And due to the fact that she is under 30, she doesn’t really have much experience with live drag queens except for the most obvious references (The Birdcage).

The whole experience got me thinking about my early days on South Beach, circa 1993, when drag shows were ubiquitous—from restaurants to nightclubs to store openings. These were serious affairs, not just kitsched-up tourists traps. Whether it was Adora vamping at Barrio or Kitty Meow working the door at Paragon, you could spot an oversized pastel wig on practically every corner of SoBe. Drag-friendly spots included Hombre, Warsaw, Kremlin, Mulberry Street, The Palace, Lulu’s and Liquid. I think there were even drag queens at the launch of The Gap on Collins Ave.

The pied piper of all this drag hoopla was Debbie Ohanian, whose Meet Me In Miami boutique and hair salon was the gathering place for Miami’s colorful set. Merle Weiss’ Merle’s Closet on the then decrepit Lincoln Road was another retail mainstay for drag queens.

Kitty Meow! Photograph by Patrick McMullan.

Drag queens were stars on the South Beach scene, often performing for the likes of Madonna, Cher and Taylor Dane (and often lip-synching their greatest hits). They were invited to the hottest parties and events. In fact, a soiree was not a success without a drag queen in attendance. Aside from Kitty Meow and Adora, popular acts spanned Daisy Deadpetals, Damian DeVine, Sexcilia and Paloma.

There was also a sub category of painted faces from the odd (Mother, Wanda and Julian Baines) to the whimsical (Shelley Novack). Novack was infamous for donning dresses with full facial and body hair sprouting out. It was as if Barney Rubble went drag. Most impressively, Shelley fought to keep drag queens relevant by working all media angles and hosting events like the Shelley Novack Awards, which gave prizes to the top performers.

Shelley Novack.

For me, I can vividly remember Adora’s exaggerated facial expressions, makeup and lip-synching. This was not dressed-up karaoke. Far from it. Drag queens of the day were dramatic productions with elaborate costumes, but more importantly, impressive choreography based upon each act’s perfectly crafted character. It was an art form more so than a cheap parlor act.

There was also a lot of cattiness and gossip surrounding the culture. Thankfully, Twitter and Facebook weren’t around, or things would have gotten nasty online. Nevertheless, there was a certain bitterness marking the decline of the drag queen moment.

Adora and Strawberry. Photograph by Patrick McMullan.

The scene started to languish with the rise of the mega clubs like Level, Mansion, Bar Room and Chaos. These spaces were too big to attract crowds based upon a drag queen’s following. Nor were these patrons the big spenders that the clubs needed to pay for multi-million-dollar build-outs and lighting systems. This era, roughly 1999 to 2007, ushered in celebrity hosts like Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie, Wilmer Valderamma, Eva Longoria, Tara Reid, Vin Diesel and Tommy Lee. Of course, clubs today are dominated by superstar DJs, who are the new draws: Swedish House Mafia, David Guetta, Avicii, Steve Aoki and Paul Oakenfeld.

Drag queens haven’t totally disappeared, however. Today’s remaining scene is dominated by Elaine Lancaster, whose towering, over-the-top blond persona pops up at charity functions, fashion shows and The Real Housewives of Miami. However, unlike her predecessors, Elaine is more of a personality than a performer. She is a brand, in fact. But lip-synching to Madonna’s “Like A Prayer”? Not so much.

Lenny Kravitz and Elaine Lancaster. Photograph by Patrick McMullan.

One of the last mainstays is Adora, who DJs at Twist fully assembled in drag. You can also catch nightly drag shows at The Palace on Ocean Drive (whose motto is: Because Every Queen Needs A Palace), but it’s played to tourists from the heartland versus South Beach locals.

At least, for one night, Priscilla Queen of the Desert brought back some Technicolor memories.

Please weigh in on your favorite drag show memories in Miami in the comments section.